Hello everyone! I am so sorry that I have not been active on my blog in a while. I think it has been about 2 weeks since I have posted anything, and to be honest, for a while I was seriously considering discontinuing this blog…yes, again. That seems to be the theme for whenever I am struggling or have a lot going on: well then I will just get rid of my blog!
Well, I woke up today refreshed and ready to go take an exam that I was actually feeling confident about. Now I have one more exam tomorrow for the week, and then I have the weekend to unwind. So, I am looking forward to that. I came home from my exam, and realized that I did not feel like studying right away…so what should I do? I really just felt like writing. I did not have a specific topic in mind to write about, but I just missed writing and expressing my thoughts. So I opened up my laptop and here I am now…writing a blog post where I have NO IDEA where it is headed, which causes anxiety, but I will make it through, just please bear with me.
This week has been crazy in almost every aspect of my life. When I say crazy, what I really mean is that I feel as if I have been one giant mess. I have been feeling ill, experiencing a lot of anxiety, having obsessive thoughts, and struggling with my eating disorder. I have also been stressed because I had a lot of school work due this week. I had a lab to complete, and two exams on back to back days. Yesterday while I was sitting in my room studying, I had a panic attack. Not just significant amounts of anxiety or worry, a full blown panic attack which I have not had in a while. I think that all of the events from the course of the week were just adding up until it pushed me over the edge. So, I talked to a close friend of mine on the phone, and I was eventually able to calm down. He told me something that makes a lot of sense but that I have not really been thinking about: Your problems may seem huge right now, and may be all that you can see, but in a week, or even in a few days, they will dissipate. I thought about this for a minute, and I realized how true this statement really is! How often do we worry and panic and dwell on the problems in our life that always eventually work themselves out? Our pain and suffering seems real and unbearable at times, especially in the moment, but can you think of a time where your suffering did not end? At least for a little while? Yes, we will always encounter stressful situations throughout our lives, but they resolve themselves with time. I think it is important to be able to look at life from a different perspective, or at least try to, when things do not seem to be going smoothly. With the help of my friend, I was able to take a step back and realize that everything will work out, it always does.
So for those of you who are struggling…with whatever it may be, try to take a step back from the situation and look at the bigger picture. In a week, month, year, will these exact problems still be as big as they seem now? If they, in fact, will be (depending on the situation) what can you do to make yourself feel better and more in control? Are there any healthy coping skills that you can turn to? Is there a way you can solve this issue? Just reflect, breathe, and know everything will be okay.